Prioritizing Self-Care: How to Fill Your Cup When You Need to Most
As moms we’re often the glue holding everything together.
We keep everything running smoothly, from packed lunches to kissing boo-boos to bedtime routines. But let’s be honest: when was the last time you truly took a moment for yourself? If your cup feels empty or even just a little low, you’re not alone. Prioritizing self-care can feel impossible when you’re juggling everything, as well as battling mom guilt, but here’s the truth: it’s not just important—it’s essential. In this post, I’m diving into how you can start making space for self-care in your life, no matter how busy things get. Because when you take care of yourself, you’re better equipped to care for everyone else. Let’s fill that cup, mama!
As an Amazon Associate, I earn commission from qualifying purchases. This post may contain affiliate links, which means I’ll receive a commission if you purchase through my links, at no extra cost to you. Please read full disclosure for more information.
How to Start Prioritizing Self-Care
The struggle to prioritize self-care is real. Between the financial issues, finding the time, and feeling just guilty about it, prioritizing self-care can seem next to impossible. Here are some tips to help you start filling up your cup.
1. Identify personal self-care practices.
Self-care activities should energize and rejuvenate you. They should be activities that you enjoy doing, because you want to be doing them, not because they are required tasks on your to-do list. Find some personal self-care practices that are really important to you. In case you need some ideas, some of my favorite self-care tips for busy moms are:
- Reading a book chapter
- A good workout
- Meditating
- Lighting a scented candle
- Drinking a warm beverage
- Curling up under a blanket
- Cuddling with one of my daughters
- Getting organized – planning out a day or week in my planner
- 4-7-8 breathing (breathe in for 4 counts, hold for 7 counts and exhale for 8 counts)
- Watching some good mindless reality TV (Housewives, anyone?)
2. Prioritize those essential self-care practices.
Go through your list of personal self-care practices and choose a few that are especially critical to you, whether that’s exercise, doctor appointments, or just some moments of quiet relaxation – and really prioritize those. Making time for the self-care activities that are most important to you can help you start to fill your cup.
Sleep is especially critical, but is something that easily falls to the wayside. I know there are days when I’m on-the-go all day and just need some time to myself after my girls are asleep. I stay up later than normal just to have some alone time but then that means I don’t get enough sleep. Sleep deprivation can catch up to you so easily and there is data linking insufficient sleep with all sorts of problems. After a few nights of poor sleep you’re at risk of moodiness and not being able to focus. If the sleep deprivation continues you’re at risk of even more serious problems such as weight gain, high blood pressure, heart disease, and much more. Having a good evening routine checklist can help set you up for a good night’s sleep.
3. Make self-care manageable.
Self-care doesn’t need to be time consuming or elaborate. If you set the bar too high for your mom goals, you’ll likely end up overwhelmed and give up. Start by incorporating small self-care activities into your daily routine, such as a quick meditation. I know you can fit in a 5-minute break! Make it manageable for your lifestyle so you stick with it. As you get used to short breaks for some self-care and feel more comfortable, you can add more activities into your daily routine.
4. Embrace journaling.
Journaling is another wonderful activity for prioritizing self-care since you can spend as little or as long on it as you have the time for. Journaling for self-care has many benefits, such as reducing stress, learning more about yourself, communicating better, sleeping better, and feeling more gratitude. An easy way to get started on a journaling practice is to begin the day by writing down a few things you are grateful for. Starting your day with some gratitude can create a more positive mindset for your day. I loved The 5-Minute Gratitude Journal by Sophia Godkin since it has quick journaling prompts that I was able to easily fit into my day.
5. Delegate and ask for help.
Don’t be afraid to ask for help from your partner, other family members, or friends. Try to outsource some of your daily tasks to leave more time for yourself. My husband and I have split up our daily tasks using the fair play method.
In her book, Fair Play, Eve Rodsky helps us prioritize tasks and delegate who fully owns them. The issue that we tend to have is that even if we have a partner who helps with the execution of household tasks, such as doing the grocery shopping, we are doing the reminding and remembering, such as making the grocery list. With the Fair Play Method, the owner of the task is responsible for the conception, planning, and execution. Fully offloading tasks can really help with reclaiming more time for yourself.
6. Schedule time for your self-care needs.
Treat your self-care as you would treat any other commitment. Block out time in your phone calendar for your self-care activities, especially the high-priority ones, so you are reminded to do them. It’s easy to get into the zone with your responsibilities and forget to take time out for yourself. Scheduling self-care in your calendar will help you hold yourself accountable.
7. Be kind to yourself.
Let go of the guilt you feel about taking time for yourself. Recognize that self-care isn’t selfish. Tell yourself that you’re not a bad mom for taking time for some self-care. You’re taking care of yourself so you can better take care of your family. If you’re really struggling with guilt, try to reframe those negative thoughts into something more positive. “I’m a bad mom because I want some alone time” can become “I deserve some alone time because I did so much for my family today and want to have the energy to continue to take care of them.”
Challenges of Prioritizing Self-Care
Prioritizing self-care isn’t easy, especially if you’re just getting started. Below are some suggestions for tackling some of the challenges that may come up for you:
- Financial Strain – As much as we’d love a day at the spa, many of us don’t have room in our budget for that. I know I don’t! However, self-care doesn’t have to be expensive. Some great “free” self-care ideas are meditating, reading motivational quotes, turning off your phone, daydreaming, and doing nothing.
- Logistical Nightmares – Coordinating schedules can be overwhelming, so it’s important to block off the time in your calendar and hold yourself accountable for prioritizing self-care.
- Guilt and Outside Pressure – It definitely feels like society wants us to do it all, so many moms feel guilty about self-care. As nice it would be to just turn off the guilt, that’s not possible. An alternative is to sit with the guilt, acknowledge that you’re feeling guilty, accept the guilt, and then move on.
- Lack of Support – Not having a supportive partner or network can make it even more difficult to have time to yourself. You can start by taking short breaks for self-care, take time for yourself when the kids are out of the house, or try hiring a babysitter to give yourself a little break.
Prioritizing self-care isn’t just a luxury.
It’s essential. As a mom, you pour so much love and energy into those around you, but you deserve to feel whole, energized, and supported too. Remember, self-care looks different for everyone; it might be a quiet cup of coffee in the morning, a 10-minute walk outside, or simply saying “no” to something that you don’t want to do. Whatever it is, know that taking care of yourself isn’t selfish—it’s necessary.
If you’d like some more help getting started, try my free 5-day self-care challenge!
Here’s your reminder: you can’t pour from an empty cup. Start small, give yourself grace, and embrace the idea that by prioritizing self-care, you’re showing up as the best version of yourself—for you and for your family.
3 Comments